i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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