Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
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