i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Randomize
