That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I'm gonna have a badass scar
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize