I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
Randomize
