38 yer olds are good kisserssss
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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