I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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