I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
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