glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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