Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
you know whats awesome about this morning. A suprise visit from my dad at 7:30 am. There was a pair of heels on the lawn and a girl sleeping in just her underwear on the floor of my living room. He either thinks im a champion or a total fuck up. I'm thinking fuck up but im hoping champion.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
