I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Text me some of your sweat
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize
