Sponge bath it is.
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
I am available for nakedness
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
Randomize
