found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
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