I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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