in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
