Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Randomize