yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
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