I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
Randomize
