doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
My liver just had a heart attack.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Randomize
