you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
