My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize
