I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Randomize