I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
