yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
