glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
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