The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
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