Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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