do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
