She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Randomize
