Where is the hickey?
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Randomize
