I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
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