I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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