so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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