Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
Randomize
