If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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