I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
Quick, to the slutcave!
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
Randomize
