Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
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