Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize
