I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
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