Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Randomize
