I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
No stitches, just platelets and will power
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
Randomize
