no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
Randomize