But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
