the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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