i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
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