shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Randomize
