doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Randomize
