it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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