I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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