How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
Randomize
