i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
Found your dick twin last night
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
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